Monday, November 17, 2008

truly smile.

i was thinking about happiness and sadness on my walk around my estate last nite.
its quite interesting how these 2 words are often mistaken,misused,misrepresented.

obviously right now im feeling sad and all,
but den i told myself to move the fuck along,
and tried to remember when was the last time i was truly happy and smiled.

not the smile that comes from amusement,
not the one tad comes when someone tickles your funny bone.
its the one you smile to yourself, secretly in your own corner as you savour tad moment,
cheekily chuckling within, a smile tad's both pleased with yourself, and with the way things are at that very moment in your life, where you're satisfied, wanting nothing more in the world, and you absolutely at the moment cant for the life of you, think of anything else you might want.

thats the smile im talking about.

so i tried remembering the last time i felt truly happy and smiled tad smile.

and since she's been such a major part of my life in the past yr, chances are of course that i'll involve her i guess.

the last time i felt so afloat on clouds so puffy light,
was slightly less then a year ago..
4 days before christmas...
i had booked outta camp,
and went over for dinner and the usual chill out time..
and we had dinner etc and etc..
and den we were both quite tired, me from ns nonsense and her from her school,
and i was laid out on the beanbag on the floor snoozing.
and den i felt something snuggle into the crook of my arm,opened one eye,and lo and behold!

my very own radiant angel.
(HAHAHA DAM CLICHE)

but yea.
=)
and as i lay there on the beanbag with her snoozing on my chest and watching her sleep(which she hates),just stroking her hair and listening to her breathing...i guess there's where i last smiled a truly happy smile.despite both our weariness, outta darkness does love sprout i guess.hahaha.

a smile tad was private tad even she didnt know,
a smile tad was cheeky cuz she didnt know i was looking and thought i was asleep too,
a smile tad was savoured as i treasured the moment for its worth,
a smile tad was smiled in the corner,
a smile tad was contented with the way everything is,
a smile tad was certain that it didnt need anithing else in the world.

a truly happy smile.

when was the last time YOU smiled a truly happy smile.
=)

i know just remembering this brightened up my night last nite tremendously.

and even as i typed this, it brightened up my day loads already.
suddenly business stats doesnt seem like such a bitch.
=)

remember your last truly happy smile.=)
hope it brings a cheer to your day like it did mine.=)

not one born of cheer,
nor born of the absence of fear,
one born of pure joy and delight,
one tad's radiant at the sight,

one that lights up one's face,
as one is slowly amazed,
at one's good fortune,
amidst the cloudy haze.

one tad seems to stretch from ear to ear,
one tad thrives in the absence of fear,
one tad makes you wish will never pass,
one tad makes your heart beat really fast,

one that makes you warm from deep within,
one tad fill your core with what has been,
a warmth tad covers you like your beloved blanky,

the smile...that is truly happy.

_________________________________________
on a side note..
just read your entry josh.
/hug.
lol.
mai depressed too plz nigga.
1 sad person is already 1 too many.=D
smileeeeeeee.
i love jo0 long long timeee

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