happy birthday me.

well.this is it,22,
been 22 for about 10 hours?
there abouts.

its been less den a perfect bdae for me i guess.
found myself breaking a promise i made to myself in sispec on the bus back.
strangly under a very different circumstance then when it last happened.

niwae,
thanks for the love,the calls,the msges.
thanks fellas.=)

mucho love.


okie time to start my assignment.

birthday cele.

lemme recount the day to you guys,
the happenings and all,
before i start gushin about this wonderful girl that gave me a chance.=)

so morning was work and school,

and in the evening,
i was supposed to hang out wit my maris guys.

so aft school,was in macs stoning and waiting for em.
so as per normal,
6 guys = about an hour in waitin time as they slowly strolled in one by one,
and for some reason,
despite my insistance to play basketball,
josh wanted to go chinatown.

now the only thing i know about chinatown is that i worked there before,
and i like the fried dumplings there.
so the instant he said chinatown,
i told em to go eat dumplings.
but he said "nooooooo....i know a place where we can go.btw,can you stay out late?we got a something planned."
my response was "wtf.why muz stay up late.you dunt try thing funny pls.dun gimme no nonsense strip shit i'll whack you"
to which he said "no la,juz tryta stay out late with us k?"
now the only other LOGICAL conclusion was Euro match,so i was more prepared for a nite out at a pub/bar,which chinatown with its proximity to club street, wasnt that outta a logical choice.

so that was the expectation part of the thing.
so aft the guys all arrived one by one,
we left for the bus to chinatown.
now tbh, i wasnt really suspecting anithing yet,
but on hindsight there were really alot of tell tale signs.

now firstly,josh doesnt really sms much, and we normally consult ourselves on wad to do and decide from there, but he kept msgin someone over the phone,before sayin anithing.however,this wasnt noticed till later.
2ndly,was that he didnt know where to go despite saying he had a place in mind.this i noticed and mercilessly suaned him.actually this was when i began to suspect something.
3rdly,globalsound.now having brought my baby to this place before,my 1st thought was "OMG I MUZ MSG HER.lol so cartoon why josh bring me this place sial.uber de javu"
now tad was on hindsight extremely stupid.so whilst waiting, i was halfway thru a sms to g alr."eh,you'll never believe it pls.they brought me to globalsound can.wth sial"

THEN it struck me.wait a min.........

so i held that msg in my hand,
waitin to see wad happened next

and more or less,
when josh said to the owner.."i THINK we have a room.on the 3rd floor."
i knew there was sumthin wrong alr.

and then when we went to the room,he called someone cuz he didnt know where to go....
and yea.


at tat time,
while standing outside the room,
i was juz hoping and hopin tad it would be the person i wanted to see the most..
and yea..

it was...

i guess pleasantly surprised doesnt cut it as i was literally struck dumb.when i saw her, it was like...i dunno like drink of water at the end of a marathon.outta sudden the weight off my shoulders was lifted pls.
i was really quite sian this week with things going on,but everythin juz faded when i saw her.

okie.
now comes the gushin part.


so this lil girl o mine,
supposedly 2 weeks ago,
contacted josh and dud thru frenster and asked for their help to arrange something.

and all of em joined in happily.there were a total of like 8 marists there,none of whom leaked a dam thing.to which,i make a rude gesture and shout "assholes" to your face. but after that hug you lovingly and tell you thanks.thanks for helping g,thanks for being there too.the only pple missed there from my close knit of frens were like daryl,fish and alv.

but otherwise,wad more could a guy ask for.
close bros,
the lady he loves.
nice relaxed atmosphere.

last night was the first in a really long long time,when i could really juz relax,
have endless stupid fun,
watch pple get drunk and do stupid shit,
pillor fight,
teh pple,

all that nonsense.
lol.even as bdae boy,
i wasnt the first to get squashed,
i can remember it was giant,who was so stoned aft a while he lay on the floor,and literally asked to be tehed.
and the best part was that he was huggin a pillor summore.like padding like tad.
not one to refuse, we obliged and were rewarded with losta flopping fish moans accompanied with lotsa "TAP OUT TAP OUT TAP OUT" calls.

and once the dam breaks.well.kinda isnt a way to hold it back.

but yes.
back to gushing.

ive gotta been one of the luckier guys in the world right now please.
whilst the line goes that behind every successful man,there's a woman,never ever really made sense to me,
i guess last nite juz proved to me how much having the lady you treasure's support can mean to you.

whilst last nite wasnt a lil thing,
its really this day to day gestures that mean so much and remind wad a fool i am to think the way i do sometimes.

so before i sign off,
and yes pictures will make it to facebook josh.
this is prob the only time im gonna bother uploading photos there.

lemme reiterate again wad a lucky s.o.b i am to have frens like ya'll,

and im even luckier to have a girl like you.

thank you baby.=)
love you.

truly.

okie stay tuned for unglam pictures of marists rolling around and doing stupid things.=)

pondering

at times.
i truly wonder what's going on, and what exactly am i doing.
CAYSN cant seem you set in, and i find myself in a rather similiar situation.
i guess its juz a personal trait, which in certain situations, becomes more of a flaw den an asset.

are there mistakes tad you keep making,
and keep tellin yourself you'll learn,
and still keep making the same one?

maybe when im wiser i'll learn to distance myself.
or it might be a forlorn wish cuz hard lessons in this area dun seem to work with me.

it reaches a point where i start being cynical and pessimistic.

/shrugs.
who knows.

my angst space ftw.

time really flies.
in exactly 2 days to the day, 1 year ago,
i found myself in a situation not quite unlike wad im in at the moment.
feeling the same way and having made a decision as a result of an inability to deal with it within myself.

maybe its cuz my perception of what it is really distorted.
maybe im juz spoilt for it forever and evermore,
tad i'll never be satisfied with anithing less.
maybe im just a brat.
or maybe im being juz dam grumpy and unreasonable at the moment.
i guess part of it deals with my idealistic nature.

that i will not accpet defeat till i experience it myself.

i guess its niave in certain aspects,
that if i am a certain way,
it would be this certain way becuz tads wad's supposed to happen.

but then again,
in this sorta things,its the change and differences that keep it interestin isnt it?
there will never be a definite for this sorta thing.
but the changes are sumtimes hard to take i guess.
and try as i might, i cant maintain it 100% of the time too.
but is it too idealistic of me to wish for it to be as close to that as possible?
oe maybe its me.
maybe im askin for more.

or isit juz my perceptions that are warped.
that im expectin wad isnt attainable in reality.

am i juz another victim of books and tv shows where idealism is writ large and i cant seem to accept reality.

im feeling just so sian some times.
its like de javu all over again.
same old situation everytime damn time.
how did i end up like tad again.

you know,
sherlock once said,

when you've eliminated all the possibilities,only the obvious remains.

so when ive exhausted making unfounded and needless approximations,

the fact that remains is that there is only 1 constant in it all.
and that would be myself.

so if this be the case,

i really needta do some reflecting,

and do things differently.

















yea like this hasnt been said so many times before.


/sigh.



maybe im juz destined to lived this fucked up life this fucked up way till i can finally settle for less or begin to accept that these things in life will NEVER be constant.
or accept myself better.

maybe tad's wad mature means eh?
being at peace with yourself.

which would mean my baby's right.

my bros are really quite much more mature den i am.

i sure as hell aint at peace with myself.
i dun think i'll be till i've achieved certain things i've set out to do in life.


idealism sucks shit.
sometimes i wonder if im too fuckin easy.

_____________________________________________
sigh on a brighter note,

something tad should amuse you.
it made me smile on a shitty day a few days back.

lol.

cheap thrills.
fruits o blog trollin

_____________

Why do men die first.

This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries, but, now we know. It requires a bit of explanation, first:

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race ... you're a male chauvinist. If you stay home and do the housework ... you're a pansy. If you work too hard ... there's never any time for her. If you don't work enough ... you're a good-for-nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay ... this is exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay ... you should get off your lazy behind and find something better. If you get a promotion ahead of her ... that is
favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you ... its equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks ... its sexual harassment. If you keep quiet . .. its male indifference. If you cry ... you're a wimp. If you don't ... you're an insensitive bastard. If you make a decision without consulting her ... you're a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you ... she's a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy ... that's domination. If SHE asks you ... it's a favor. If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear ... you're a pervert. If you don't ...you're gay.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape ... you're sexist. If you don't ... you're unromantic. If you try to keep yourself in shape .. you're vain. If you don't ... you're a slob. If you buy her flowers .. you're after something. If you don't ... you're not thoughtful.

If you're proud of your achievements ... you're full of yourself. If you don't ... you're not ambitious. If she has a headache ... she's tired. If you have a headache .. you don't love her anymore.

If you want it too often ... you're oversexed. If you don't ... there must be someone else.

Why do men die first ?

Because they want to.

Get Your Sexy Name

nickelback

dor some reason,
im feeling dam emo and sian now.
and i cant really place a finger on to as why.

and this began long before i started heading home,
and still even aft hours of gaming.
gettin loot and all,
im still feeling the same.
so i have decided to blog a slightly less emo post bout something i thought of whilst in the shower.

there's a line in the nickelback song.
actually,
its the dam title of the song.
which goes

"is someone getting the best of you"
which sounds normal,
the following line which then goes
"is someone taking the pain you feel, you trust too much , confess, is someone gettin the best the best the best of you"

now i thought that was just about the most telling line of the song as i revealed the true nature of line before it.

alone,
the line sounds like an accusation almost,
but then it gets all put together as actually a line of concern.
interesting i guess.

okie.
this isnt working,
not feeling anibetter.
fuck this.

okie time for bed.