sighz.
wassup pple.
its been eternity since i've blogged gues.
wad's been up.
nuttinmuch.
school's boring,
my life's gettin tragically dismal again.
my christian walk is slippin.
its juz amazin how much things can change in the short span of a week or two..
or three.
its juz amazing how things juz wunt work out.
you can read the signs n hope..
and then circumstances come about n rob you of the very hope tad drives you own.
sgh.
sorry fer the typos.
usin a whole new keyboard standard.
hmm.
yeahz.
robs you of the very hope tad keeps you driving on.
if there's anithin i hate in the world its responsibilty.
the quintessential value tad makes us singaporean i guess.
my sista's in east asia,
doin God's work.
every nite i pary fer her n the team safety.
and yet.
i cant seem to attain my nirvana and sustain it.
my area of perpertual bliss.
i dun mean contentment.
contentment's a sinch compared wit bliss pls.
how to be content.
simply accept life fer wad it is i guess?
lower your standards.
i know loadsa pple who do that.
wen they cant attain wad the seek fer,
they juz lower their standards,
being satisfied wit wad they have n juz bein in anti loco.
i'll much rather be a grumpy person searchin fer sumthin better in life to make mi happy den be content wit my own inadequacies.
the way i see it,
if God has sumthin good and perfect fer mi,
it sure as hell aint gonna be easy to attain.
so if you alow yourself to be content n stay in stasis,
you mite never reach tad level pr perpertual bliss tad's been planned out fer you.
or mi fer tad matter.
which juz angers me.
i really cant help but feel really hateful n spiteful to this world tad i live in.
wherein lies my nirvana.
wherein lies my solace.
i know in the Lord is the peace tad encompasses all.
but yet.
im really havin trouble acknowledgin my religion now pls.
i relly cant help it.
my walk is in shambles.
and i dun tink i can continue pushin on if i gif it up cuz i know its all tad is left of my driving force.
i dun wanna kid myself.
i'll prob end up wit a BBC wit muz prob a B fer gp but imma hopin fer an A.
tad's a really optimistci grade outlook alr.
i cant say much else cuz plainly there's not much to look forward to.
sigh.
i was readin this book by meg cabot in school.
(dun even begin askin my why i read it,the bimbo who sits next to mi had it,i was bored,i kapped it and read it.)
i wanna be a qoute "modelizer" unqoute.
go figure.
sighz.
havin to gif up a certain person tad i was told to,which i know is the right thing to do,which i know is incredibly hard fer mi to do havin been enamoured by her fer so many yrs has left an anticiator empty space within myself.
and the truth of the matter is,
i aint gonna get much in the way of gorgeous gals in the next 3 yrs.
aft A's,
imma play wow,join src hockey,join rage soccer.
in other words,
imma be in the same societical circle tad ive been in,
hence,
wad new gals?wad prospects.
i.e-O.
next 2 yrs,
imma be in ns.
and i've sen evidence within my present social circle tad NS men are indeed desperate.
dun kid yaself.
if your in Ns and you dun know tad,
go get a grip.
you're obviously in dreamland,
OR.
you club your days outta NS away,grab any chick tad'll spread her nest fer you n kid yourself tad you're not lonely n you dun feel empty inside.
hence,
wake up.
chances are you'll prob get aids.
sighz.
i dunno la.
i read a book.
it said sumthin bout "findin the truth towards our cosmic loneliness"
fer lmi.
im still tryin to solve my own earthly loneliness.
i really cant figure.
social creature tad i am,
able to talk to muz ple,
offer tad listenin ear,
and havin my (if i may) not exactly trivial wisdom,
i cant figure wh i cant find my ideal clique of beautiful pple.
as in like in the pure un adulterated sense of the word.
simple put,
beautiful both within and witout.
i seem to find tad true inner beauty lies within pple tad i dun consider gorgeous,
and true outer beauty lies within pple who seem so shallow n insignificant within it seems like its a well of emptyness.
where is this clique of truly gorgeous pple tad i've been searchin fer.
i feel like i've got sumthin to prove,
but yet deep inside i know its really quite insignificant.
but its like my own guilty pleasure i guess.
i reall cant hep it.
the good lookin guys i've been in contact with with the exceptions of my bros are all so dam ass SHALLOW n tink they own the whole world cuz they're good lokin
their concept of the world bein their present surroundins n countin how many gals check em out.
the good lookin gals are even worse.
they tink the very land the walk upon should be worshipped by a posse of desperate men.
notice i didnt say with the exceptions of my sistas.
cuz basically,
no gals i've met can fit within my defination of sistas.
wit the exception of my blood sista i guess.
i really cant help it.
all my exposure to the world of females has taught mi tad females are juz sad.
they border on both extremes.
but yet imma modelizer.
sighz.
like wad more can i say pls.
juz sucks pls.
where is my nirvana?
hahaha.
i sumtimes really tink i'll die before i can find her.
how ironic eh?
i spend the 1st 20 yrs of my life figurin out wad kinda gal i wan,
the next 20 hopin i'll find her,workin my ass off juz in case if she caomes along sh'll be impressed,
the next 20 figurin where i went wrong,
the next 10 in retirement wonderin wad e hell happened to my dream.
den i die.
gee.
sighz.
sorry.
pessimism runeth over.
but all i've seen.
i really cant hope fer much.
maybe bein in a foreign land'll ake things easy fer mi.
maybe i'll find my nirvana there.
and if ya hvent figured,
my nirvana bein in a woman'a arms,
a gorgeous individual tad i love n loves mi back,
one tad's accepted by my family,frens,who'll all be there to support mi wen i wait at the end of tad matrimonial aisle.
one tad'll be able to help mi in all i do.
one tad'll help mi be at peace wit the world.
dos she exist?
aft seein all the singaporean gals.
i hafta say,
i'll prob end up wit and angmor.
HAHAHA
and den mummy'll kill mi.
hmm.
i'll settle fer sum1 as oxymoronic as mi.
i.e,
open minded but still rooted enough in conservative asian values.
sum1 who loes goin ou but yet cherishes family time at home.
sum1 who knows the world but concerns over home.
all the kinda stupid oxymorons tad make mi who i am i guess.
*shrugs*
im weird.
i need a weird hot gal.
go figure.
im not ashamed to say i need a hot gal.
i really cant figure.
i mean.
who wouldnt wanna hot gal.
im juz voicin out wad i really feel insteada wat the pple need to hear.
those guys tad say:i juz wan sum1 wit a nice smile"
they be yankin your chain.
aint no such thing pls.
if tad be the case,
gif him a fat lad wit a big smile.
seeif his face turns in horror.
den i'll laff at all your ill concieved pre-notions bout how nice n real this guy is.
pfft.
gonna sto here before i offend more sensibilities.
not tad i exactly care rite now.
wad a difference 2weeks makes.
p.s-i love the new foo fighters song.
sighz.:)) AWESOME.
Saturday, July 23, 2005
back once again.
sighz.
wassup pple.
its been eternity since i've blogged gues.
wad's been up.
nuttinmuch.
school's boring,
my life's gettin tragically dismal again.
my christian walk is slippin.
its juz amazin how much things can change in the short span of a week or two..
or three.
its juz amazing how things juz wunt work out.
you can read the signs n hope..
and then circumstances come about n rob you of the very hope tad drives you own.
sgh.
sorry fer the typos.
usin a whole new keyboard standard.
hmm.
yeahz.
robs you of the very hope tad keeps you driving on.
if there's anithin i hate in the world its responsibilty.
the quintessential value tad makes us singaporean i guess.
my sista's in east asia,
doin God's work.
every nite i pary fer her n the team safety.
and yet.
i cant seem to attain my nirvana and sustain it.
my area of perpertual bliss.
i dun mean contentment.
contentment's a sinch compared wit bliss pls.
how to be content.
simply accept life fer wad it is i guess?
lower your standards.
i know loadsa pple who do that.
wen they cant attain wad the seek fer,
they juz lower their standards,
being satisfied wit wad they have n juz bein in anti loco.
i'll much rather be a grumpy person searchin fer sumthin better in life to make mi happy den be content wit my own inadequacies.
the way i see it,
if God has sumthin good and perfect fer mi,
it sure as hell aint gonna be easy to attain.
so if you alow yourself to be content n stay in stasis,
you mite never reach tad level pr perpertual bliss tad's been planned out fer you.
or mi fer tad matter.
which juz angers me.
i really cant help but feel really hateful n spiteful to this world tad i live in.
wherein lies my nirvana.
wherein lies my solace.
i know in the Lord is the peace tad encompasses all.
but yet.
im really havin trouble acknowledgin my religion now pls.
i relly cant help it.
my walk is in shambles.
and i dun tink i can continue pushin on if i gif it up cuz i know its all tad is left of my driving force.
i dun wanna kid myself.
i'll prob end up wit a BBC wit muz prob a B fer gp but imma hopin fer an A.
tad's a really optimistci grade outlook alr.
i cant say much else cuz plainly there's not much to look forward to.
sigh.
i was readin this book by meg cabot in school.
(dun even begin askin my why i read it,the bimbo who sits next to mi had it,i was bored,i kapped it and read it.)
i wanna be a qoute "modelizer" unqoute.
go figure.
sighz.
havin to gif up a certain person tad i was told to,which i know is the right thing to do,which i know is incredibly hard fer mi to do havin been enamoured by her fer so many yrs has left an anticiator empty space within myself.
and the truth of the matter is,
i aint gonna get much in the way of gorgeous gals in the next 3 yrs.
aft A's,
imma play wow,join src hockey,join rage soccer.
in other words,
imma be in the same societical circle tad ive been in,
hence,
wad new gals?wad prospects.
i.e-O.
next 2 yrs,
imma be in ns.
and i've sen evidence within my present social circle tad NS men are indeed desperate.
dun kid yaself.
if your in Ns and you dun know tad,
go get a grip.
you're obviously in dreamland,
OR.
you club your days outta NS away,grab any chick tad'll spread her nest fer you n kid yourself tad you're not lonely n you dun feel empty inside.
hence,
wake up.
chances are you'll prob get aids.
sighz.
i dunno la.
i read a book.
it said sumthin bout "findin the truth towards our cosmic loneliness"
fer lmi.
im still tryin to solve my own earthly loneliness.
i really cant figure.
social creature tad i am,
able to talk to muz ple,
offer tad listenin ear,
and havin my (if i may) not exactly trivial wisdom,
i cant figure wh i cant find my ideal clique of beautiful pple.
as in like in the pure un adulterated sense of the word.
simple put,
beautiful both within and witout.
i seem to find tad true inner beauty lies within pple tad i dun consider gorgeous,
and true outer beauty lies within pple who seem so shallow n insignificant within it seems like its a well of emptyness.
where is this clique of truly gorgeous pple tad i've been searchin fer.
i feel like i've got sumthin to prove,
but yet deep inside i know its really quite insignificant.
but its like my own guilty pleasure i guess.
i reall cant hep it.
the good lookin guys i've been in contact with with the exceptions of my bros are all so dam ass SHALLOW n tink they own the whole world cuz they're good lokin
their concept of the world bein their present surroundins n countin how many gals check em out.
the good lookin gals are even worse.
they tink the very land the walk upon should be worshipped by a posse of desperate men.
notice i didnt say with the exceptions of my sistas.
cuz basically,
no gals i've met can fit within my defination of sistas.
wit the exception of my blood sista i guess.
i really cant help it.
all my exposure to the world of females has taught mi tad females are juz sad.
they border on both extremes.
but yet imma modelizer.
sighz.
like wad more can i say pls.
juz sucks pls.
where is my nirvana?
hahaha.
i sumtimes really tink i'll die before i can find her.
how ironic eh?
i spend the 1st 20 yrs of my life figurin out wad kinda gal i wan,
the next 20 hopin i'll find her,workin my ass off juz in case if she caomes along sh'll be impressed,
the next 20 figurin where i went wrong,
the next 10 in retirement wonderin wad e hell happened to my dream.
den i die.
gee.
sighz.
sorry.
pessimism runeth over.
but all i've seen.
i really cant hope fer much.
maybe bein in a foreign land'll ake things easy fer mi.
maybe i'll find my nirvana there.
and if ya hvent figured,
my nirvana bein in a woman'a arms,
a gorgeous individual tad i love n loves mi back,
one tad's accepted by my family,frens,who'll all be there to support mi wen i wait at the end of tad matrimonial aisle.
one tad'll be able to help mi in all i do.
one tad'll help mi be at peace wit the world.
dos she exist?
aft seein all the singaporean gals.
i hafta say,
i'll prob end up wit and angmor.
HAHAHA
and den mummy'll kill mi.
hmm.
i'll settle fer sum1 as oxymoronic as mi.
i.e,
open minded but still rooted enough in conservative asian values.
sum1 who loes goin ou but yet cherishes family time at home.
sum1 who knows the world but concerns over home.
all the kinda stupid oxymorons tad make mi who i am i guess.
*shrugs*
im weird.
i need a weird hot gal.
go figure.
im not ashamed to say i need a hot gal.
i really cant figure.
i mean.
who wouldnt wanna hot gal.
im juz voicin out wad i really feel insteada wat the pple need to hear.
those guys tad say:i juz wan sum1 wit a nice smile"
they be yankin your chain.
aint no such thing pls.
if tad be the case,
gif him a fat lad wit a big smile.
seeif his face turns in horror.
den i'll laff at all your ill concieved pre-notions bout how nice n real this guy is.
pfft.
gonna sto here before i offend more sensibilities.
not tad i exactly care rite now.
wad a difference 2weeks makes.
p.s-i love the new foo fighters song.
sighz.:)) AWESOME.
wassup pple.
its been eternity since i've blogged gues.
wad's been up.
nuttinmuch.
school's boring,
my life's gettin tragically dismal again.
my christian walk is slippin.
its juz amazin how much things can change in the short span of a week or two..
or three.
its juz amazing how things juz wunt work out.
you can read the signs n hope..
and then circumstances come about n rob you of the very hope tad drives you own.
sgh.
sorry fer the typos.
usin a whole new keyboard standard.
hmm.
yeahz.
robs you of the very hope tad keeps you driving on.
if there's anithin i hate in the world its responsibilty.
the quintessential value tad makes us singaporean i guess.
my sista's in east asia,
doin God's work.
every nite i pary fer her n the team safety.
and yet.
i cant seem to attain my nirvana and sustain it.
my area of perpertual bliss.
i dun mean contentment.
contentment's a sinch compared wit bliss pls.
how to be content.
simply accept life fer wad it is i guess?
lower your standards.
i know loadsa pple who do that.
wen they cant attain wad the seek fer,
they juz lower their standards,
being satisfied wit wad they have n juz bein in anti loco.
i'll much rather be a grumpy person searchin fer sumthin better in life to make mi happy den be content wit my own inadequacies.
the way i see it,
if God has sumthin good and perfect fer mi,
it sure as hell aint gonna be easy to attain.
so if you alow yourself to be content n stay in stasis,
you mite never reach tad level pr perpertual bliss tad's been planned out fer you.
or mi fer tad matter.
which juz angers me.
i really cant help but feel really hateful n spiteful to this world tad i live in.
wherein lies my nirvana.
wherein lies my solace.
i know in the Lord is the peace tad encompasses all.
but yet.
im really havin trouble acknowledgin my religion now pls.
i relly cant help it.
my walk is in shambles.
and i dun tink i can continue pushin on if i gif it up cuz i know its all tad is left of my driving force.
i dun wanna kid myself.
i'll prob end up wit a BBC wit muz prob a B fer gp but imma hopin fer an A.
tad's a really optimistci grade outlook alr.
i cant say much else cuz plainly there's not much to look forward to.
sigh.
i was readin this book by meg cabot in school.
(dun even begin askin my why i read it,the bimbo who sits next to mi had it,i was bored,i kapped it and read it.)
i wanna be a qoute "modelizer" unqoute.
go figure.
sighz.
havin to gif up a certain person tad i was told to,which i know is the right thing to do,which i know is incredibly hard fer mi to do havin been enamoured by her fer so many yrs has left an anticiator empty space within myself.
and the truth of the matter is,
i aint gonna get much in the way of gorgeous gals in the next 3 yrs.
aft A's,
imma play wow,join src hockey,join rage soccer.
in other words,
imma be in the same societical circle tad ive been in,
hence,
wad new gals?wad prospects.
i.e-O.
next 2 yrs,
imma be in ns.
and i've sen evidence within my present social circle tad NS men are indeed desperate.
dun kid yaself.
if your in Ns and you dun know tad,
go get a grip.
you're obviously in dreamland,
OR.
you club your days outta NS away,grab any chick tad'll spread her nest fer you n kid yourself tad you're not lonely n you dun feel empty inside.
hence,
wake up.
chances are you'll prob get aids.
sighz.
i dunno la.
i read a book.
it said sumthin bout "findin the truth towards our cosmic loneliness"
fer lmi.
im still tryin to solve my own earthly loneliness.
i really cant figure.
social creature tad i am,
able to talk to muz ple,
offer tad listenin ear,
and havin my (if i may) not exactly trivial wisdom,
i cant figure wh i cant find my ideal clique of beautiful pple.
as in like in the pure un adulterated sense of the word.
simple put,
beautiful both within and witout.
i seem to find tad true inner beauty lies within pple tad i dun consider gorgeous,
and true outer beauty lies within pple who seem so shallow n insignificant within it seems like its a well of emptyness.
where is this clique of truly gorgeous pple tad i've been searchin fer.
i feel like i've got sumthin to prove,
but yet deep inside i know its really quite insignificant.
but its like my own guilty pleasure i guess.
i reall cant hep it.
the good lookin guys i've been in contact with with the exceptions of my bros are all so dam ass SHALLOW n tink they own the whole world cuz they're good lokin
their concept of the world bein their present surroundins n countin how many gals check em out.
the good lookin gals are even worse.
they tink the very land the walk upon should be worshipped by a posse of desperate men.
notice i didnt say with the exceptions of my sistas.
cuz basically,
no gals i've met can fit within my defination of sistas.
wit the exception of my blood sista i guess.
i really cant help it.
all my exposure to the world of females has taught mi tad females are juz sad.
they border on both extremes.
but yet imma modelizer.
sighz.
like wad more can i say pls.
juz sucks pls.
where is my nirvana?
hahaha.
i sumtimes really tink i'll die before i can find her.
how ironic eh?
i spend the 1st 20 yrs of my life figurin out wad kinda gal i wan,
the next 20 hopin i'll find her,workin my ass off juz in case if she caomes along sh'll be impressed,
the next 20 figurin where i went wrong,
the next 10 in retirement wonderin wad e hell happened to my dream.
den i die.
gee.
sighz.
sorry.
pessimism runeth over.
but all i've seen.
i really cant hope fer much.
maybe bein in a foreign land'll ake things easy fer mi.
maybe i'll find my nirvana there.
and if ya hvent figured,
my nirvana bein in a woman'a arms,
a gorgeous individual tad i love n loves mi back,
one tad's accepted by my family,frens,who'll all be there to support mi wen i wait at the end of tad matrimonial aisle.
one tad'll be able to help mi in all i do.
one tad'll help mi be at peace wit the world.
dos she exist?
aft seein all the singaporean gals.
i hafta say,
i'll prob end up wit and angmor.
HAHAHA
and den mummy'll kill mi.
hmm.
i'll settle fer sum1 as oxymoronic as mi.
i.e,
open minded but still rooted enough in conservative asian values.
sum1 who loes goin ou but yet cherishes family time at home.
sum1 who knows the world but concerns over home.
all the kinda stupid oxymorons tad make mi who i am i guess.
*shrugs*
im weird.
i need a weird hot gal.
go figure.
im not ashamed to say i need a hot gal.
i really cant figure.
i mean.
who wouldnt wanna hot gal.
im juz voicin out wad i really feel insteada wat the pple need to hear.
those guys tad say:i juz wan sum1 wit a nice smile"
they be yankin your chain.
aint no such thing pls.
if tad be the case,
gif him a fat lad wit a big smile.
seeif his face turns in horror.
den i'll laff at all your ill concieved pre-notions bout how nice n real this guy is.
pfft.
gonna sto here before i offend more sensibilities.
not tad i exactly care rite now.
wad a difference 2weeks makes.
p.s-i love the new foo fighters song.
sighz.:)) AWESOME.
Sunday, July 10, 2005
wad can one say.
its really been sucha crappy week,
sucha crappy weekend.
im really sorry fer the grim looks,
the snappiness tad i've layered onto pple.
but at in the end.
i really cant fault my actions pls.
it came from the frustrations of the inevitablity of how one's life's gonna turn out and the frustration of bein unable to change society and the wheels tad continue spinnin on wit time.
it juz sucks pls.
tis was supposed to be God's world.
n likw.
it rawlly sucks la.
i realy regret my actions of the past.
i know they'll come back to haunt mi one day.
i wish i had been wiser.
but everythin happens fer a reason n i choose to believe tad sumthin good will come out of this.
everythin will work out in the end.
i will learn my lessons.
i will be wise.
i will work my way overseas and make sure i turn out to be sumthin tad God'll be proud of.
i shall return being a fine n upstart gentlemen n start leadin kids in my life long dream of being a teacher who changes lives.
i really wanan make sure i can do all tad.
but at the same time i hafta have the financial security before all that is possible.
and i hafta work my ass off to get oversaes n get my stupid certificates to prove to the world im woth tad money.
so thus.
the reason fer my frustration.
but all i wanan do now is save money n study hard.
so im really dissapointed wit myself.
but yet i know.
im not gonna have time fer anithin else.
sighz.
sucks la.:(
dunno wad im talkin bout too.
hopefully wen friday comes about.
i'll be more clear minded by then.
goodbye all.
sighz.
sucha crappy weekend.
im really sorry fer the grim looks,
the snappiness tad i've layered onto pple.
but at in the end.
i really cant fault my actions pls.
it came from the frustrations of the inevitablity of how one's life's gonna turn out and the frustration of bein unable to change society and the wheels tad continue spinnin on wit time.
it juz sucks pls.
tis was supposed to be God's world.
n likw.
it rawlly sucks la.
i realy regret my actions of the past.
i know they'll come back to haunt mi one day.
i wish i had been wiser.
but everythin happens fer a reason n i choose to believe tad sumthin good will come out of this.
everythin will work out in the end.
i will learn my lessons.
i will be wise.
i will work my way overseas and make sure i turn out to be sumthin tad God'll be proud of.
i shall return being a fine n upstart gentlemen n start leadin kids in my life long dream of being a teacher who changes lives.
i really wanan make sure i can do all tad.
but at the same time i hafta have the financial security before all that is possible.
and i hafta work my ass off to get oversaes n get my stupid certificates to prove to the world im woth tad money.
so thus.
the reason fer my frustration.
but all i wanan do now is save money n study hard.
so im really dissapointed wit myself.
but yet i know.
im not gonna have time fer anithin else.
sighz.
sucks la.:(
dunno wad im talkin bout too.
hopefully wen friday comes about.
i'll be more clear minded by then.
goodbye all.
sighz.
and you give yourself away...
lookie here.
sighz.
church was okay.
i shall now recap yest.
as in the better parts.
the pseudo alumni vs the present yr teams.
it was a pretty good match i guess.
fiar competition from both sides,
i sprained my ankle again but still kept on playin,
the final score was 3:3
wit the score seesawing between us,
seniors scored 1st,
den juniors equalised,
den seniors 2nd,
den juniors..
den same thing..
the final 2 seniors goals were scored by yours truly,
the 1st being a loose ball pounce and the 2nd being a volley from juz inside the dee.
so yup.
it was a pretty good match all round.
den i came back,
showered,
rested n studied at nite.
so yup.tad's bout how the whole day went.
den today was pretty the same la.
went to church.
couldnt really get ministered cuz of sumthin being on my mind.
den went fer lunch wit parents,
den went to study at KAP,
did tys question fer math.
found out i couldnt do it.
so tad sucks.
well and good.
never mind.
in the end i juz wanna go study and earn money.
tad's bout the whole reason fer our existence here aniway wad.
i dun believe a person can serve the Lord witout havin his heart in peace.
n if tad be the case,
i sure as hell better start makin myself feel secure if not i'll juz be hampered in the end again.
so yup.
im really in a dam bad mood this few days.
so pardon mi if i dun smile so much.
dun laf so much.
and snap at you.
its really nuttin tad ya'll can help.
maybe pray fer mi to haf determination.
but fer now.
all i care about is studies and findin a way tog et cash to go oversaeas to study.
so yup.
bye all.
parents being annoyin.
com hasta go outta the room.
watch this spot this fri.
i'll prob hav it back again then.
bye all.
sighz.
church was okay.
i shall now recap yest.
as in the better parts.
the pseudo alumni vs the present yr teams.
it was a pretty good match i guess.
fiar competition from both sides,
i sprained my ankle again but still kept on playin,
the final score was 3:3
wit the score seesawing between us,
seniors scored 1st,
den juniors equalised,
den seniors 2nd,
den juniors..
den same thing..
the final 2 seniors goals were scored by yours truly,
the 1st being a loose ball pounce and the 2nd being a volley from juz inside the dee.
so yup.
it was a pretty good match all round.
den i came back,
showered,
rested n studied at nite.
so yup.tad's bout how the whole day went.
den today was pretty the same la.
went to church.
couldnt really get ministered cuz of sumthin being on my mind.
den went fer lunch wit parents,
den went to study at KAP,
did tys question fer math.
found out i couldnt do it.
so tad sucks.
well and good.
never mind.
in the end i juz wanna go study and earn money.
tad's bout the whole reason fer our existence here aniway wad.
i dun believe a person can serve the Lord witout havin his heart in peace.
n if tad be the case,
i sure as hell better start makin myself feel secure if not i'll juz be hampered in the end again.
so yup.
im really in a dam bad mood this few days.
so pardon mi if i dun smile so much.
dun laf so much.
and snap at you.
its really nuttin tad ya'll can help.
maybe pray fer mi to haf determination.
but fer now.
all i care about is studies and findin a way tog et cash to go oversaeas to study.
so yup.
bye all.
parents being annoyin.
com hasta go outta the room.
watch this spot this fri.
i'll prob hav it back again then.
bye all.
the money entry.
sighz.
those of you who have no wish to see materialistic thoughts pls not bother readin this entry.
like honestly.
we're really shallow pple after all.
n i hafta say,
being a singaporean makes us even shallower.
1st.
let mi gripe,bitch,moan,whine whichever word you prefer.
money.
my goodness.
bein rich entitles you to so much.
or maybe juz bein in america entitles you to tad much.
i have a fren.
this ultimate being of gorgeousness tad juz about sums up my dream gal cept fer her bad habits.
my bros oughta have heard this name before.
ashley chay baoyi.
back in sec three,
whilst i was goin fer a math tuition,
i met her,
this lil dopey boy i was back then,
this really hyper,cheerful cute lil babe from rgs.
fer sum reason i was always sulkin durin math tuition cuz i hated it,
so i didnt really know why she came up to talk to mi in the 1st place.
it was kinda funny n flatterin at the same time i guess.
we could've been sumthin i guess,
if i hadta been such a ignorant n slack dumbass.
yesh.
hear the regret in my voice.
anyway,
after tad yr,
she left to go to the american school in shanghai,cuz her dad was posted there.
bout 6 months later,
she came back to singapore to visit her extended family,
was here fer juz bout 3 short days.
one day was spent with her family,
another with the cousins,
the other day she asked mi out.
we went to holland v,ate sum jap noodles,went to starbucks n sat down n chatted bout how we both wanted our lives to turn out to be.
she had the priviledge of enterin the us education system which fer one,i have always envied.
so she was tellin mi the stuff she wanted done,
she listened to all my dreams.
and before she left,
she gave mi a hug(my 1st hug from a gal mind you.)and promised to call mi out the next time she came back.
and as things progressed,
i lost my computer due to parental control shat,
we dropped outta touch..
and yup..
that call never came.
the next time she came back was about 2 yrs aft tad meetin we had.
and she'd changed a lot i guess.
aniwae,
how do i know all this?
well.
she was online juz now.
and graces upon all graces,
she remembered who i was and we chatted fer a while.
lemme tell you where she is now.
she's my age.
and she's in the UPenn.
tell mi bout accomplishments,street skills,everythins,
she leaps and bounds ahead of everyone i can name tad i know of at my age.
in other words,
she's juz about the average US kiddo wit prob higher grades cuz she's always been really hardworkin.
but wen i read her blog(which she juz gave mi the address again,once again cuza my lousy ass com)juz now,
i hafta tell you.
i felt so much envy and regret n surprisingly,a whole loada disrespect n hate fer singapore's education system,our asian culture and all.
the tone on the blog is that of sum1 who's seen the world,
at my age,
she's gone on trips all over the world,
once again wit money much is possible,
seen a whole load more of the diff levels of society,
such a mature n world wizened tone pls.
and i cant help feelin envious of that.
i feel regret tad i never bother actually lookin her up,
payin more attention to her in tad period of time where she was ina sense,now wen i look back,hittin on mi.
the singaporean education system,i've bithced about a whole shatload of times alr,
i shall not bother anymore.
but hate was a total surprise on my part.
i actually felt anger at my placement in this place where i am rite now.
i know God has his purpose for mi here and now,
but even still.
it really sucks pls.
seein how she's moved on in her life made me so angsty of the restrictions set by my parents,
by the culture tad impedes mi.
basically everythin rite now.
and i realise tad alot of it hasta do with a 5 letter asset.
its called the $.
i have nuttin much to say tad we're all so dam ass shallow sumtimes n tad i tink its imperative tad we all go out to see the world.
as a result of this experience tad i have juz undergone,
i haf decided to leave everythin behind.
allowance shall be saved,my pitiful ns pay shall be saved.
im goin overseas to studies.
if i make it in a uni here i'll stud here 1st.
but at the same timee i'll gif tuition,go overseas n study in the end.
im not gonna be sum lameass narrowminded singaporean trapped by my own melodramaticism.
i've got 1 short term target.
australia fer this november.
anyone has any sec/pri school tuition ya can recommend,pls do?
i need the extra cash.
i wanna go overseas n widen my perspective.
i dun wanna look at myself n find myself comin up short in the world.
sighz.
i shall gripe more about it another time pls.
im juz really feelin down now pls.
it really REALLY sucks to see myself against this one person tad i had found myself to be of the same intellectual sense can be soo far ahead of mi.
plus my 2 lousy ass yrs in NS.
she'll have gotten her degree by the time im out,
n prob doin even more whilst i hafta start at the bottom rug.
and im a bLOODY RETAINEE.
like how degradin is tad pls.
i feel like crap now.
my self esteem is prob at a all time low now.
and i've got no one to blame but myself n my folly pls.
and it sucks.
i've gotta start makin sumthin work fer myself.
and i need cash.
LOADS of cash.
its a money world.
and i need money.
money gaf her tad extra lift.
i want tad lift too.
n one thing's fer sure.
im not stayin in singpore alr.
oh yeahz.
as a bitter aftertone.
ya'll wanna know wad i was too immature to appreciate?
of course she's got her faults.
now she's become sumthin totally unrecognisable to mi tad even if she hit on mi again i'll prob say no.
cuz of her character change.its like the typical wild party gals tad i totally regard with disdain.
but yeahz.
on terms on physical attraction.
no one has ever come close to her.
hurrhurr.
sighz.
sleep time.
those of you who have no wish to see materialistic thoughts pls not bother readin this entry.
like honestly.
we're really shallow pple after all.
n i hafta say,
being a singaporean makes us even shallower.
1st.
let mi gripe,bitch,moan,whine whichever word you prefer.
money.
my goodness.
bein rich entitles you to so much.
or maybe juz bein in america entitles you to tad much.
i have a fren.
this ultimate being of gorgeousness tad juz about sums up my dream gal cept fer her bad habits.
my bros oughta have heard this name before.
ashley chay baoyi.
back in sec three,
whilst i was goin fer a math tuition,
i met her,
this lil dopey boy i was back then,
this really hyper,cheerful cute lil babe from rgs.
fer sum reason i was always sulkin durin math tuition cuz i hated it,
so i didnt really know why she came up to talk to mi in the 1st place.
it was kinda funny n flatterin at the same time i guess.
we could've been sumthin i guess,
if i hadta been such a ignorant n slack dumbass.
yesh.
hear the regret in my voice.
anyway,
after tad yr,
she left to go to the american school in shanghai,cuz her dad was posted there.
bout 6 months later,
she came back to singapore to visit her extended family,
was here fer juz bout 3 short days.
one day was spent with her family,
another with the cousins,
the other day she asked mi out.
we went to holland v,ate sum jap noodles,went to starbucks n sat down n chatted bout how we both wanted our lives to turn out to be.
she had the priviledge of enterin the us education system which fer one,i have always envied.
so she was tellin mi the stuff she wanted done,
she listened to all my dreams.
and before she left,
she gave mi a hug(my 1st hug from a gal mind you.)and promised to call mi out the next time she came back.
and as things progressed,
i lost my computer due to parental control shat,
we dropped outta touch..
and yup..
that call never came.
the next time she came back was about 2 yrs aft tad meetin we had.
and she'd changed a lot i guess.
aniwae,
how do i know all this?
well.
she was online juz now.
and graces upon all graces,
she remembered who i was and we chatted fer a while.
lemme tell you where she is now.
she's my age.
and she's in the UPenn.
tell mi bout accomplishments,street skills,everythins,
she leaps and bounds ahead of everyone i can name tad i know of at my age.
in other words,
she's juz about the average US kiddo wit prob higher grades cuz she's always been really hardworkin.
but wen i read her blog(which she juz gave mi the address again,once again cuza my lousy ass com)juz now,
i hafta tell you.
i felt so much envy and regret n surprisingly,a whole loada disrespect n hate fer singapore's education system,our asian culture and all.
the tone on the blog is that of sum1 who's seen the world,
at my age,
she's gone on trips all over the world,
once again wit money much is possible,
seen a whole load more of the diff levels of society,
such a mature n world wizened tone pls.
and i cant help feelin envious of that.
i feel regret tad i never bother actually lookin her up,
payin more attention to her in tad period of time where she was ina sense,now wen i look back,hittin on mi.
the singaporean education system,i've bithced about a whole shatload of times alr,
i shall not bother anymore.
but hate was a total surprise on my part.
i actually felt anger at my placement in this place where i am rite now.
i know God has his purpose for mi here and now,
but even still.
it really sucks pls.
seein how she's moved on in her life made me so angsty of the restrictions set by my parents,
by the culture tad impedes mi.
basically everythin rite now.
and i realise tad alot of it hasta do with a 5 letter asset.
its called the $.
i have nuttin much to say tad we're all so dam ass shallow sumtimes n tad i tink its imperative tad we all go out to see the world.
as a result of this experience tad i have juz undergone,
i haf decided to leave everythin behind.
allowance shall be saved,my pitiful ns pay shall be saved.
im goin overseas to studies.
if i make it in a uni here i'll stud here 1st.
but at the same timee i'll gif tuition,go overseas n study in the end.
im not gonna be sum lameass narrowminded singaporean trapped by my own melodramaticism.
i've got 1 short term target.
australia fer this november.
anyone has any sec/pri school tuition ya can recommend,pls do?
i need the extra cash.
i wanna go overseas n widen my perspective.
i dun wanna look at myself n find myself comin up short in the world.
sighz.
i shall gripe more about it another time pls.
im juz really feelin down now pls.
it really REALLY sucks to see myself against this one person tad i had found myself to be of the same intellectual sense can be soo far ahead of mi.
plus my 2 lousy ass yrs in NS.
she'll have gotten her degree by the time im out,
n prob doin even more whilst i hafta start at the bottom rug.
and im a bLOODY RETAINEE.
like how degradin is tad pls.
i feel like crap now.
my self esteem is prob at a all time low now.
and i've got no one to blame but myself n my folly pls.
and it sucks.
i've gotta start makin sumthin work fer myself.
and i need cash.
LOADS of cash.
its a money world.
and i need money.
money gaf her tad extra lift.
i want tad lift too.
n one thing's fer sure.
im not stayin in singpore alr.
oh yeahz.
as a bitter aftertone.
ya'll wanna know wad i was too immature to appreciate?
of course she's got her faults.
now she's become sumthin totally unrecognisable to mi tad even if she hit on mi again i'll prob say no.
cuz of her character change.its like the typical wild party gals tad i totally regard with disdain.
but yeahz.
on terms on physical attraction.
no one has ever come close to her.
hurrhurr.
sighz.
sleep time.
Saturday, July 09, 2005
twinkle,twinkle fadin star,your light seems so faint from afar.
after a really long time,i finally get to use the com again.gah pls.
wanted to use it alst nite but didnt haf time.
sighz.
twinkle twinkle fadin star,
your light seems so faint from afar,
blinding radiance slowly fades,
till a speck's all tad's seen of your face,
twinkle twinkle fadin star,
missed,will ya glow be from afar.
sighz.
its been a crappy week.
:(
sighz.
i hope tml's hockey match will make up a long way fer it.
sighz.
i really wish sumthin major would come into my life n take the place of exams.
sumthin tad'll make mi smile tad radiant smile of pure joy i used to wen life was soo much easier,
wen last min study before the O's still got you an A grade,
where school was a place where you went to to sleep your mornin n aft lessons away,
and only woke up to play bball during recess and lunch breaks.
where bros you knew you could rely on surrounded you and yelled encouragement at you.
where the teachers all knew your face n smiled at you everytimes you crossed their path,
where you had the self confidence to swagger arnd the school compound like you owned it.
i really hate bein a responsible person.
i hate havin to make the rite decisions all the time.
i hate having to study cuz i dun wanna let the pple who believe in mi down.
i hate havin to study cuz its the right thing to do.
but yet if i dun let these really wrong things motivate mi to study.
i wouldnt stuy at all.
ya'll mite all shout"bro its time to get a new perspective,you're workin fer yaself man!"
but to mi it doesnt really matter.
i know.
im a short sighted dim witted clown who cant see the big picture.
so bite mi.
im juz gettin really tired of it all.
every mornin i dread having to drag my lazy ass outta bed,
movin it to school,
plonkin it down in hard plastic chairs in uncomfortable hot classrooms,
doin the RIGHT thing.
i hate it all.
but still,i gotta do it.
sigh.
i really miss chillin out.
i really do.
i need sum1 who can minister to my heart and soul.
i've got God fer my soul,
where's the person who can minister deep into my heart n heal the ragged edges and mutiple hairline cracks tad run wild across it.
i want my ONE Lord.
show mi who it is,
allow mi to be content with who she is,
let mi love her fer who she is.
i HATE having to tink about "is she the right girl for mi,
is she God's choosen one fer mi.
juz dump her uncerimoniously in fronta me,
tell mi to shut up,
love her,
be a good and loyal husband and tad;'s it.
i wanna haf a clear path in life tad i know pleases you.
i dun wanna afta wonder about my actions being right of wrong,
pleasin to You or not,
i dun wnana hafta debate if studyin is thing tad'll please You,
and if i do it wit a reluctant heart its not true worship,
but yet in my act of doin it its an act of submission,
so thus it'l please you wit a ratio of two:1.
tad's juz ridiculous.
and highyl perplexin.
sighz.
i really wish things were diff..
i wan my special sum1.
whether is my special someone back(referrin to my sole ex),
of whether is the next person tad God's gonna place in my life fer mi to learn wad's the true meanin of love.
i wan tad person now,
and i wan her to like mi too.
tad makes things a hell lot easier on my end.
aight Lord?
in Jesus's name i pray.Amen.
gah.
sighz.
i hope tad doesnt count as blasphemy.
oh wells.
imma go sleep.
tuiton,
den hockey beckons.
YAY!.:)
time to dust of my wife(mt beautiful tk cruise compo stick) and get ready to run again.:))
YAy.im my age.woohoo.
PFFT
wanted to use it alst nite but didnt haf time.
sighz.
twinkle twinkle fadin star,
your light seems so faint from afar,
blinding radiance slowly fades,
till a speck's all tad's seen of your face,
twinkle twinkle fadin star,
missed,will ya glow be from afar.
sighz.
its been a crappy week.
:(
sighz.
i hope tml's hockey match will make up a long way fer it.
sighz.
i really wish sumthin major would come into my life n take the place of exams.
sumthin tad'll make mi smile tad radiant smile of pure joy i used to wen life was soo much easier,
wen last min study before the O's still got you an A grade,
where school was a place where you went to to sleep your mornin n aft lessons away,
and only woke up to play bball during recess and lunch breaks.
where bros you knew you could rely on surrounded you and yelled encouragement at you.
where the teachers all knew your face n smiled at you everytimes you crossed their path,
where you had the self confidence to swagger arnd the school compound like you owned it.
i really hate bein a responsible person.
i hate havin to make the rite decisions all the time.
i hate having to study cuz i dun wanna let the pple who believe in mi down.
i hate havin to study cuz its the right thing to do.
but yet if i dun let these really wrong things motivate mi to study.
i wouldnt stuy at all.
ya'll mite all shout"bro its time to get a new perspective,you're workin fer yaself man!"
but to mi it doesnt really matter.
i know.
im a short sighted dim witted clown who cant see the big picture.
so bite mi.
im juz gettin really tired of it all.
every mornin i dread having to drag my lazy ass outta bed,
movin it to school,
plonkin it down in hard plastic chairs in uncomfortable hot classrooms,
doin the RIGHT thing.
i hate it all.
but still,i gotta do it.
sigh.
i really miss chillin out.
i really do.
i need sum1 who can minister to my heart and soul.
i've got God fer my soul,
where's the person who can minister deep into my heart n heal the ragged edges and mutiple hairline cracks tad run wild across it.
i want my ONE Lord.
show mi who it is,
allow mi to be content with who she is,
let mi love her fer who she is.
i HATE having to tink about "is she the right girl for mi,
is she God's choosen one fer mi.
juz dump her uncerimoniously in fronta me,
tell mi to shut up,
love her,
be a good and loyal husband and tad;'s it.
i wanna haf a clear path in life tad i know pleases you.
i dun wanna afta wonder about my actions being right of wrong,
pleasin to You or not,
i dun wnana hafta debate if studyin is thing tad'll please You,
and if i do it wit a reluctant heart its not true worship,
but yet in my act of doin it its an act of submission,
so thus it'l please you wit a ratio of two:1.
tad's juz ridiculous.
and highyl perplexin.
sighz.
i really wish things were diff..
i wan my special sum1.
whether is my special someone back(referrin to my sole ex),
of whether is the next person tad God's gonna place in my life fer mi to learn wad's the true meanin of love.
i wan tad person now,
and i wan her to like mi too.
tad makes things a hell lot easier on my end.
aight Lord?
in Jesus's name i pray.Amen.
gah.
sighz.
i hope tad doesnt count as blasphemy.
oh wells.
imma go sleep.
tuiton,
den hockey beckons.
YAY!.:)
time to dust of my wife(mt beautiful tk cruise compo stick) and get ready to run again.:))
| Slow and Steady |
 They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment. They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it. |
How Do People See You?
You Are 19 Years Old |
19 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax. |
YAy.im my age.woohoo.
PFFT
Thursday, July 07, 2005
maybe,maybe,never.
sighz.
i relaly am quite demoralised.:(
i really did study during the june hols.
and yet.
the results dun seem to be comin forth.
i was aimin fer stragith Os.
kinda like a steppin stone so i can like work my way up to like Cs fer prelims and like Bs and As by the A's.
but yet.
i see improvement.
but yet.
its not enuf.
not nuf fer mi,sure as hell not enuf for my parents.
i remember distinctly tellin my fren tad there's nutin to prove to pple.
tad she shouldnt like start bawlin juz cuz she cant meet the expectations tad pple set fer her.
and the expectations tad she sets fer herself.
and yet.
now imma victim of tad very same curse.
:(
sighz.
wad have i gotten back.
i missed my chem O by bout 2 %.
i passed my physics mcq.
everythin else's hasnt been returned yet.
sighz.
it really sucks pls.
granted,i did haf times during the hols where i totally gave up fer like a coupla hours,but eventually i came back to force myself to study thanks to the driving force of purpose driven life.
sighz.
but yet.
and O fer chem isnt tad hard to achieve pls.:(
and i missed it by like 3 marks.
like how much inustice is there la.
i minused a total of 5 marks fer not writin state symbols,
3 marks fer decimal places,
bout 6 marks where i had the right answer and everythin but i didnt get any marks due to lousy presentation.
:(
tad pple,is a total of like 14 marks,
which roughly translates into 7 %,
which pro gets mi like an E.
its not any consolation to me tad like outta the whole class,
only 3 pple got Bs,
the rest got E,O,F.
so like wad pls.
whose expectations am i strivin to reach.
my own?
or God's even.
sighz.
it really sucks.
imma hit the books again pls.
this is highly annoyin.
sighz.:(
i HATE school.
but yet i muz strive to get like a B average wen the A's.
and i cant put off organic chem animore alr.
its time to study it and get myself sum marks outta the STUPID 60 marks the allocated it and i didnt even try doin.:@
why?
cuz i decided to forgo org chem.
how dumb pls.
angst.
sighz.
bloody chem.
stupid physics,
even worse math.
sighz.
so much fer my steepin stone.
how depressin.
sighz.
on another note,
school's got new computers.
yay.
sighz.
i hate my life,
but yet havin to live it to glorify God makes it really hard fer mi to stay angsty at it long.
sighz.
i dun like purpose driven life.
its made mi stop bitchin alot,
made mi a generally batter person,
but still.
sumtimes yo wish you could cut loose,
yell out a stream o vugarities to turn the sky blue,
den feel alot better.
but then its all bout self control.
sighz.
christian life is really alot bout holdin back pls.:(
sighz.
oh wellz.
bye guys.
shall update we i got more time.
shall go recess now.:(
i relaly am quite demoralised.:(
i really did study during the june hols.
and yet.
the results dun seem to be comin forth.
i was aimin fer stragith Os.
kinda like a steppin stone so i can like work my way up to like Cs fer prelims and like Bs and As by the A's.
but yet.
i see improvement.
but yet.
its not enuf.
not nuf fer mi,sure as hell not enuf for my parents.
i remember distinctly tellin my fren tad there's nutin to prove to pple.
tad she shouldnt like start bawlin juz cuz she cant meet the expectations tad pple set fer her.
and the expectations tad she sets fer herself.
and yet.
now imma victim of tad very same curse.
:(
sighz.
wad have i gotten back.
i missed my chem O by bout 2 %.
i passed my physics mcq.
everythin else's hasnt been returned yet.
sighz.
it really sucks pls.
granted,i did haf times during the hols where i totally gave up fer like a coupla hours,but eventually i came back to force myself to study thanks to the driving force of purpose driven life.
sighz.
but yet.
and O fer chem isnt tad hard to achieve pls.:(
and i missed it by like 3 marks.
like how much inustice is there la.
i minused a total of 5 marks fer not writin state symbols,
3 marks fer decimal places,
bout 6 marks where i had the right answer and everythin but i didnt get any marks due to lousy presentation.
:(
tad pple,is a total of like 14 marks,
which roughly translates into 7 %,
which pro gets mi like an E.
its not any consolation to me tad like outta the whole class,
only 3 pple got Bs,
the rest got E,O,F.
so like wad pls.
whose expectations am i strivin to reach.
my own?
or God's even.
sighz.
it really sucks.
imma hit the books again pls.
this is highly annoyin.
sighz.:(
i HATE school.
but yet i muz strive to get like a B average wen the A's.
and i cant put off organic chem animore alr.
its time to study it and get myself sum marks outta the STUPID 60 marks the allocated it and i didnt even try doin.:@
why?
cuz i decided to forgo org chem.
how dumb pls.
angst.
sighz.
bloody chem.
stupid physics,
even worse math.
sighz.
so much fer my steepin stone.
how depressin.
sighz.
on another note,
school's got new computers.
yay.
sighz.
i hate my life,
but yet havin to live it to glorify God makes it really hard fer mi to stay angsty at it long.
sighz.
i dun like purpose driven life.
its made mi stop bitchin alot,
made mi a generally batter person,
but still.
sumtimes yo wish you could cut loose,
yell out a stream o vugarities to turn the sky blue,
den feel alot better.
but then its all bout self control.
sighz.
christian life is really alot bout holdin back pls.:(
sighz.
oh wellz.
bye guys.
shall update we i got more time.
shall go recess now.:(
Sunday, July 03, 2005
self absorbed in melodramaticism
you know..i've been doin alot of tinkin..
and i really hafta the applaud the power of one's mind pls..
you'll surprise yaself wit wad you can achieve wen you put ya mind to it..
haf ya ever found yaself not doin sumthin due to limitations you set on yaself?
ike you tell yaelf "you cant study" and you find yaself wringin ya hands in resignation cuz you feel you really cant pls.
but yet.
wen you put ya mind to it you find yaself strangly capable of bein to tough it out.
tad and the power of prayer pls.
or how bout tellin yaself "you're so this..so that..."
so much tad you find yaself believin it so much so..
i remeber stupid things i did last time..
tryin to decieve myself wit sumthin tad i wanted to be so real..
and i believed it..
i tot i really realy liked this gal so..
but yet wen i lost her,
it didnt really matter much to mi.
it kinda is amusing pls.
wad have you said you are lately?
too tired?
so sick of school?
too sick of life?
too much of this,too much of tad..?
you'll be surprised at how wrong you are if you're willin to take tad chance n change ya perceptions pls.
things you used to not even fathom yaself bein able to do mite suddenly fall rite witin ya arms.
no kddin.
victims of our own melodramaticism.
i really believe this to be a serious situation.
i cant even begin to count the no. of mistakes i've made cuz of my own self melodramaticism.
believin myself to be in my very own soap drama wit like the world as the audience and ya frens as fellow cast members..
den like you cast yaself as the stereotypical character akin to all soap dramas.
besetted on all sides by unfriendly forces,
den you're like e lonely one waitin for sumthin to happen.
wells.
news flash:
its not goin to happen.
unless you YOURSELf decide to make sumthin happen.
so yup.:))
message from your frenly neighbourhood fren who's been ther and done tad all before.
if stop makin yourself the star of a darma of your own makin.
wake up,
smell the roses,
grip reality n shake everythin loose from it so you can collect the change.
den you'll live a much hapier and better life.:))
on an entirely diff notes.
i was on a bus to suntec today.
and i went past raffles city.
and MAN.
the IOC pple were either meetin there or like stayin there.
but God,im proud of Singapore.
1stly,to be respected nuf to be able to host it.
and like yeahz.
its so awesome pls.
n one thing you gotta gif the gahmen la.
they really know have security la.
man.
goin along the one road,
i saw a total of like 10 uniformed police officers,
half of em operatin those crash preventor barriers.
the other half were millin anrd.
den besides them,
there were 4 ghurkas carryin stock mp5 and wearin their straw hats.
dam contrastin image.
like funny nice guys cuz of the hat,
imma kill you cuz of the gun.
den wen the bus went past the junction i saw the other side had the same thing.
but the ghurkas were standin in the middle of this patch plated greenery along the driveway which i tot was hilariously funny.:))
den i saw this guy at the side of the road wit like those flesh colored ear pieces tad you only see in movies.:))
dam cool.
and if movies are anythin to go by,
if you see one,
there's prob like 20 hidden ones.
so yup pls.:))
the gahmen may be many things,
but it sure as hell keeps this pkace secure pls.:)
thumbs up fer gahmen.
yay.
k
done my citizen's duty fer today.
nite all.
sista performance was totally awesome.
took loadsa pictures.
needta work on my skills wit a camera pls.
oh wells.
and i really hafta the applaud the power of one's mind pls..
you'll surprise yaself wit wad you can achieve wen you put ya mind to it..
haf ya ever found yaself not doin sumthin due to limitations you set on yaself?
ike you tell yaelf "you cant study" and you find yaself wringin ya hands in resignation cuz you feel you really cant pls.
but yet.
wen you put ya mind to it you find yaself strangly capable of bein to tough it out.
tad and the power of prayer pls.
or how bout tellin yaself "you're so this..so that..."
so much tad you find yaself believin it so much so..
i remeber stupid things i did last time..
tryin to decieve myself wit sumthin tad i wanted to be so real..
and i believed it..
i tot i really realy liked this gal so..
but yet wen i lost her,
it didnt really matter much to mi.
it kinda is amusing pls.
wad have you said you are lately?
too tired?
so sick of school?
too sick of life?
too much of this,too much of tad..?
you'll be surprised at how wrong you are if you're willin to take tad chance n change ya perceptions pls.
things you used to not even fathom yaself bein able to do mite suddenly fall rite witin ya arms.
no kddin.
victims of our own melodramaticism.
i really believe this to be a serious situation.
i cant even begin to count the no. of mistakes i've made cuz of my own self melodramaticism.
believin myself to be in my very own soap drama wit like the world as the audience and ya frens as fellow cast members..
den like you cast yaself as the stereotypical character akin to all soap dramas.
besetted on all sides by unfriendly forces,
den you're like e lonely one waitin for sumthin to happen.
wells.
news flash:
its not goin to happen.
unless you YOURSELf decide to make sumthin happen.
so yup.:))
message from your frenly neighbourhood fren who's been ther and done tad all before.
if stop makin yourself the star of a darma of your own makin.
wake up,
smell the roses,
grip reality n shake everythin loose from it so you can collect the change.
den you'll live a much hapier and better life.:))
on an entirely diff notes.
i was on a bus to suntec today.
and i went past raffles city.
and MAN.
the IOC pple were either meetin there or like stayin there.
but God,im proud of Singapore.
1stly,to be respected nuf to be able to host it.
and like yeahz.
its so awesome pls.
n one thing you gotta gif the gahmen la.
they really know have security la.
man.
goin along the one road,
i saw a total of like 10 uniformed police officers,
half of em operatin those crash preventor barriers.
the other half were millin anrd.
den besides them,
there were 4 ghurkas carryin stock mp5 and wearin their straw hats.
dam contrastin image.
like funny nice guys cuz of the hat,
imma kill you cuz of the gun.
den wen the bus went past the junction i saw the other side had the same thing.
but the ghurkas were standin in the middle of this patch plated greenery along the driveway which i tot was hilariously funny.:))
den i saw this guy at the side of the road wit like those flesh colored ear pieces tad you only see in movies.:))
dam cool.
and if movies are anythin to go by,
if you see one,
there's prob like 20 hidden ones.
so yup pls.:))
the gahmen may be many things,
but it sure as hell keeps this pkace secure pls.:)
thumbs up fer gahmen.
yay.
k
done my citizen's duty fer today.
nite all.
sista performance was totally awesome.
took loadsa pictures.
needta work on my skills wit a camera pls.
oh wells.
Saturday, July 02, 2005
take my hand and walk
i juz got back from evangelistic gig not long ago...
hmmm.
1 word : AWESOME.
heh.
i realy thank God fer the gig pls.
and joey comin over to chat wit us before the gig.
cuz he did so,
wen the time came fer mi to share wit fysh,
i was stuck,
but he came n open up everythin.:))
and tad really helped.:))
sooner or later fysh's gonna convert RITE FYSH. ;) HAHAHAHAHA
but yup.:))
i thank God fer his choosin to have put joey at my table tonight.:))
Thanks JOEY.:))
hmm.
the band was awesome.
the sound was awesome,
fysh and i were singin to almuz every song belted out,
it was juz such a wonderful time of juz chillin out after sooooo darn long...
today signalled the end of my mid terms.
i frankly and quite afraid of the results.
i await em wit mountin trepidation.
i juz hope fer a COO.
as in like a base to work my way up upon?
but yet i feel its not likely.
sighz.
im not gonna gif myself too long a break.
gonna resume studyin tml.
living my life as a living sacrifice.
i juz wanna do right.
and if right fer now means i study,
i shall.
funny how wen i finally surrender,everythin seems soo much simpler...
on another note..
you know..
the pple you've liked before in ya past life?
and like even tho you've moved on..or so you tink..
sumhow lookin at the person suddenly makes you have this sense of longin...
i asked fer a sign not long ago..
bout a certain sum1,
and whether or not she'll remember my birthday.
and if she didnt,
its not God's will fer mi to wait fer her.
and she didnt remember,
and so i moved on.
i patched up wit old enemies,
made things straight and settled every single one of my interpersonal realationships..
and moved on...
or so i tot..
but yet today aft the gig n all..
on the train home wen mi n fysh were juz listenin to our mp3s,
i startin tinkin bout her again..
its so easy to put sum1 outta ya mind wen you udn see em..
but yet wen you see tad person..
funny thoughts keep comin back.
oh wells.
nvm pls.:))
im content plus im FAVOURED.
the Lord'll take care of my ALL.:))
my ipod's got a new look.:)) check it out next time you're out wit mi.:))
i tink its darn good lookin.
cheaper den the 40bucks place in bishan,
cuz i got it fromn fookeat..
but its still not the whole covered thing..
i figure if the 40 bcusk place has sumthin tad covers the whole pod entirely,
den i'll still go get it done there.:))
my pod's like my grip on sanity now.:))
HAHAHA
tad's quite sad.
narhz.
its prob God pls.:))
not prob,definitely,
but God created music to make things easier.:))
YAY.:))
HAHAHAH
aight.
imma head to bed.
nite world.
hmmm.
1 word : AWESOME.
heh.
i realy thank God fer the gig pls.
and joey comin over to chat wit us before the gig.
cuz he did so,
wen the time came fer mi to share wit fysh,
i was stuck,
but he came n open up everythin.:))
and tad really helped.:))
sooner or later fysh's gonna convert RITE FYSH. ;) HAHAHAHAHA
but yup.:))
i thank God fer his choosin to have put joey at my table tonight.:))
Thanks JOEY.:))
hmm.
the band was awesome.
the sound was awesome,
fysh and i were singin to almuz every song belted out,
it was juz such a wonderful time of juz chillin out after sooooo darn long...
today signalled the end of my mid terms.
i frankly and quite afraid of the results.
i await em wit mountin trepidation.
i juz hope fer a COO.
as in like a base to work my way up upon?
but yet i feel its not likely.
sighz.
im not gonna gif myself too long a break.
gonna resume studyin tml.
living my life as a living sacrifice.
i juz wanna do right.
and if right fer now means i study,
i shall.
funny how wen i finally surrender,everythin seems soo much simpler...
on another note..
you know..
the pple you've liked before in ya past life?
and like even tho you've moved on..or so you tink..
sumhow lookin at the person suddenly makes you have this sense of longin...
i asked fer a sign not long ago..
bout a certain sum1,
and whether or not she'll remember my birthday.
and if she didnt,
its not God's will fer mi to wait fer her.
and she didnt remember,
and so i moved on.
i patched up wit old enemies,
made things straight and settled every single one of my interpersonal realationships..
and moved on...
or so i tot..
but yet today aft the gig n all..
on the train home wen mi n fysh were juz listenin to our mp3s,
i startin tinkin bout her again..
its so easy to put sum1 outta ya mind wen you udn see em..
but yet wen you see tad person..
funny thoughts keep comin back.
oh wells.
nvm pls.:))
im content plus im FAVOURED.
the Lord'll take care of my ALL.:))
my ipod's got a new look.:)) check it out next time you're out wit mi.:))
i tink its darn good lookin.
cheaper den the 40bucks place in bishan,
cuz i got it fromn fookeat..
but its still not the whole covered thing..
i figure if the 40 bcusk place has sumthin tad covers the whole pod entirely,
den i'll still go get it done there.:))
my pod's like my grip on sanity now.:))
HAHAHA
tad's quite sad.
narhz.
its prob God pls.:))
not prob,definitely,
but God created music to make things easier.:))
YAY.:))
HAHAHAH
aight.
imma head to bed.
nite world.
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