victims of our own destiny

you know.
the way things are lookin to me rite now.
i tink even the muz enthusiastic side of me's gonna be collapsin n admittin defeat soon.
maybe tis whole jc thing really is not the route fer me.
for all my hopes,my faith in myself.
its juz not happenin.
and it really hurts.
sighz.
3yrs in tis place.
and ive grown.
loads.
but yet.
i come away with nothin tad'll stand up as potentially useful to the world.
and then again you ask.
why the hoohah about holistic education if in the end,
nothing counts fer nought except fer the papers you hold in your hand.
i figure if all else fails,
im gonna teach P.E fer about 4 yrs once im outta ns.
and then i'll save tad money to go overseas n study fer a yr or so.
i'll slowly work my englsh degree out from nothing.
sighz.
and den i'll come back n teach.
the dream life i wanna lead'll still be achievable,
but the time i haf to live it'll be shorter.
sighz.
it really hurts.
im really depressed as of now.
but then again.
no one really cares rite?:)
ahahahah.
wad a wonderful world.
we have songs screamin "spread the love"
and den we haf multifaceted facades of interests.
i really have lost faith in the wholehumankind.

hmmm.
maybe not guys.
maybe cuz i've been blessed wit good bros.
i've got fysh n alv in the recent yrs,
and my bros like dud,josh,giant,tim who've been in my life one way or the other fer the past few yrs.
strange funny perspectives.
but it sucks in the end wen you get down to it.
immma juz rambling but yet relationships are so hard to upkep even wen parties fully understand n appreciate each other.
and if its tis hard fer bro-bro relationship,
wad more a guy-gal.

gals are enigmatic creatures.
you never really can figure em out.
even wen you do,
chances are you wunt even know cuz of a thing called PMS.
so once again.
true understandin doesnt exist in relationships.
to me its more a form of mutual tolerance.
and once tad tolerance is gone,
nothing's gonna hold the two pple together.
so much fer the power of love.
im bein highly antheist,
but i really cant care about it now.
lala.
im gone.
gonna play stupid online games before i go back n study.
:@

i shall buy wow tml.
fysh-wanna come toget dude?msg mi.

sighz.ridiculous things to do.

hmmm.
im really stressed i tink.
all at the same time,
highly hilarious things i've been doin.
i've been doin ALOT of stupid stuff tad makes mi seem retarded.
sayin things,
doin things witout tinkin,
basically,
doin crazy things to tryta retain my sanity.
i shall not go into details rite now,
but suffice to say,
i'll get shot in america if i say it over the dinner table,
plus it makes me look really REALLY depraved.
HAHAHAHA
sighz.
really beeen doin stupid things.
but at least it'll be kept to the halls of pjc la.
i hope.
HAHAHAHA
the only reason why im doin shat thar's cuz imjma leavin tad place niwae.
so doesnt matter.
HAHAAH
unless i get back as a P.E teacher next yr.
den im screwed.
HAHAAHAH.
speakin of which,
i gotta apply now.
bb ina sec.


GRRR.
the bloody online application's not catered towards pple stressed.
bloody hell.
so darn difficult LA!!!!!!
tink i shall go there directly n apply.
basket.
:@
nex time i go fer raf i shall head over early den go sign up.
sighz.
ANGST.


as i was sayin.
if im talkin to you now,
pls dun take me seriously,
you're prob gonna get mighty offended.
HAHAHA.
excuse my manners.
but yea.
i really cant care.
i juz wan tis ordeal to be over.
sighz.

jeez.

lol.
all you pple out there dam cartoon.
there's nuttin funny bout it wad.
its juz lame spammin.
i tot the soup kambing bit was dam funny tho.
the theme was supposed to be fast food la.
lol.
niwaez.
i swear if i go to a psychaitrist now i'll get myself cinically diagnosed as depressed.
tad's low low i feel now.
yay.
:@

whoopeee.

hmmm.
this blog kinda suffered a cardiac arrest.
lol.
niwaez.
IT LIVES!!!!!!:) yay.
hmmm.
wad has been goin on.
im officially becomin a lil mugger.
its horrifyin,
i beat myself stupid all day against the table tad is COE n all the other remedials in school.
im also totally BUTT BORED.
i need sumthin in school to do besides look at books n feel stupid,
talk to my mats n feel stupid.
look at pple in class n feel lazy.
you kinda get my drift alr.
all my frens advice is the same.
one of 2 options.

option 1:go study la.

:@
up yours.

option 2:get a new trix la.
which my answer would be a resoundin "WHO."
its really dam hard to find a decent lookin gal in school pls.
maybe i really have set my standards too high.
i dun understand why everyone tells mi "you should really lower your standards"
like gee pls.
i know how much im worth.
i believe tad God has the best for me.
why should i settle for sumthin less.
it juz doesnt make sense.
*shrugs*
added to the fact,
i've come a long way from the days where my body was tight n like muscular.
so like yea pls.
the no of glances i get in school have dropped drastically.
HAHAHAHAHA
gee pls.
i make it sound like imma pop star.
sighz.
life's juz weird la.
i shant comment further.
it juz sucks.
plus the fact tad i havent "played the field" fer so long i prob cant remember howta start.
oh wellz.
there's always university WEN i get there.
*all note the confidence injected in the above statement*
sighz.
im bored shatless.
i aint got a new trix.
to sum it up.
;(
imma in a rut,
tad's gonna last another 1 month n 2 weeks.
till the A's are over,
i doubt there're be genuine happiness in my life fer the indefinite future unless sumthin unexpected n wonderful which i've been hopin fer happens.
which i dun even know wad it is.
but it kinda goes along the line of a really hot gal comin up wit a really cool device tad lets me store all my A level stuff within and hour within my brain,den i'll marry her n we'll earn lotsa money n go travel the world n make lil hot babes n dudes.
YAY.
gah.:@:@:@@:@:@:@:

i wanna 40 yr old virgin.
any old nuf person wanna go watch.
its fer >18 pple pls.
gah.
angst angst frustration frustration.
imma go write a song tonight.
tml's farewell assembly.
gee pls.
cant wait!!!
i wonder wad's ins store fer us.
lemme guess.
MR KWEK's GONNA TALK!!:)
yay.
THE BAND IS GONNA PLAY!!
WOW.
THE DANCE CLUB'S GONNA ...*GUESS GUESS!!!!* ^CORRECT!!!!!^ THEY'RE GONNA DANCE.
fer all the good tad'll do.
everyone's got so much make up on it look like krusty the clown did make p on em.
but at least the make up helps.
imaginary temporal eye candies fer amusement.
im always highly bemused by corny dance steps pls.
i end up laffin at the dance steps insteada check the chicks out.
HAHAHAHAHA
but its relaly butt hilarious.
*SNORTS SNORTS*
sorry but i got high expectations wen it comes to dance to pls.
why.
cuz i dance.
HAHAHAAHAHA
bleahz.
i tink imma bit psychotic now.
i shall juz stop rambling incoherent rubbish here.
YAYAYAYAAYAYAAYAYAY
papaya
here's the bored jokes i came up wit in clas to amuse myself.


why did the potato go to france?

S:to become a french fry.

why did the cod swim across the river?

S:to become filet-o-fysh

why did the cow run across the road?

S:to become Whopper.

why did the chicken cross the road?

s:to visit KFC or become a Mchicken

why did the mushroom scurry to switzerland?

S:to become mushroom swiss.

why did the lamb roll across the road?




































S: to become soup KAMBING.

HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
imlame.
hail bored stupid lazy boy.
i wanna WOW.:@
my shaman's in stasis.
i need to reawake the BEAST!!!